Pulling a Homer

Now that I've been selling stuff my dad has started taking an interest in it because I'm making money. It's like the relationship between Homer and Lisa Simpson. He only takes interest in what she does when it's beneficial to him. Which was highlighted in such episodes "Lisa the Greek", "I'm Spelling as Fast as I Can", and "Homer and Lisa Exchange Crosswords".

Helpless Baby!

In a sleepy stupor I accidentally took the remote for the converter box into my room before I went to sleep. The remote is also black like my phone and MP3 player. I just scooped up a group of black colored items off the couch.

In the morning my parents wake me up in a panic about how they can't find the remote. My mom gets mad at me because I left the remote by the printer the day before.

The only reason I hide the remote is because if it is out in plain view and my dad wakes up he rudely swipes it, and makes some complaint about what I'm watching; usually it's too loud or he doesn't like the program.

My dad really tried to get me in trouble by pretending not knowing how to work the converter box manually. I know he can do that I've seen him.

DON'T BE SUCH A FUCKING HELPLESS BABY!

Incompetence Squared

My dad is upset because after he finished school they helped him write a resume. The only problem is that they made it for him and put it in a PDF file. He got mad at me because I couldn’t turn it into a word file. Usually I tell him I don't know how to do something so he won't constantly bother me for tech support. This time I truly don't know how to do that. Oh well I'm either seen as incompetent or really incompetent.

In the Cards

My dad's new scheme is to sell his cards. He's been saying that for years since the mid 90s. I'll believe it when it I see it. He is doing this backwards first he got a binder and then he is getting the holders. Shouldn't he see how many cards he has before he does that? What do I know? He is the "expert" on this.

I wonder how valuable he thinks his cards are? I've seen them. They are pretty beat up, and smell moldy. Poor condition is poor condition right? I want to see how he comes up with the price? What will he use? His poor internet search skills? Asking at card stores? Driving around to unrealted places? Get himself one of those sports card guide books? Like when he tired to evaluate the price of those Franklin Mint Jazz records. Or when he tried to price his surfboard and ended up look up "surfboard" on ebay and getting a bunch of unrelated results like surfboard shaped key chains. Well that stereo he's been trying to sell is still sitting in the garage even though it is very valuable.

I hope I don't unwillingly get roped into this.

EDIT THEM IN THE FUCKING COMPUTER!

I wrote a tweet about him trying to guilt me into tech support. I'm so FUCKING SICK OF IT! What is he going to do when I'm not at home!? Then he got mad because there was no more black ink. If you want to print in black you'll need black ink. How stupid is he? Maybe if he didn't print out a bunch of rough drafts of his papers from school and just EDIT THEM IN THE FUCKING COMPUTER! There wouldn't be so much black ink wasted. He prints pages and pages. I see them just falling out of the printer onto the floor.

He told me he found this site and thought it was a legit site or something, and not a domain that is vacant. As of this post it's vacant. I'm not advertising this site.

Later he was trying to give advice into character he is one of the last people who should give advice on that. That is some kind of joke right?

All I Really Want

I there was one thing that I could have that I can't get it would be... It wouldn't be some fancy clothes or shoes, or even a car. It would be acceptance from my father.

I feel I'm not overreacting about this subject and this is not a pity party blog.

You are probably thinking "why would I say such a thing?" To me the writing is on the wall. It's the way he talks to me. It's the way he treats me. He says so many disparaging things towards me. He's hardly ever encouraging unless it's towards his benefit.

I just try so hard to be a good daughter. Ok so maybe I'm not a good athlete, or not a nerd, or even have a job. But maybe nothing that I do is really good enough. I just feel so misunderstood a lot. Sometimes I feel like I'm in the way between the relation between my dad and his nephew. In some way I really like to find a way to liberate my dad and make him happy.

Before he gets ready to visit my cousin he acts all strange. He gets all goofy and upset at the same time. He gets like mood swings. Any little thing can annoy him; cats, the neighbors doing construction work, things on tv, and other dumb things. He also starts buying a bunch of miscellaneous things like cookies and drinks. You should hear the way my dad's voice lights up when ever my cousin calls. I imagine them in that played out scene where to people are running to each other in a meadow with open arms. Then my dad would pick up my cousin and carry him in a threshold pose.

I wish I could just post this blog and make my dad change. Too bad it's not like a movie where things like that happen. If it really worked I'd post this blog everyday. Why is there so much pain?

An idea Wrapped in a Trick

I'm not a very savvy person most of the time, and I know that. I must have the phrase "stupid" written across my forehead or something like that. He keeps trying to get me to leave the house, and I think there is a trick wrapped in that. Why be so eager to get me to leave the house? I'm not like him where I have to leave the house everyday no matter what to "get out". He did this at the old house too.

He use to be a good trickster like something out of a Uncle Remus book; like the Brer characters. Lately he has been getting sloppy. His insults are poor. (which is a good thing) His excuses need improvement. I'd give him an "N" for needs improvement. His "ideas" are the worst! He seems to be losing his touch!